Project: Color Me Beautiful – Slow Your Roll

By: Melanie E. Ballard

“Slow down, you move too fast.  Ya gotta make the morning last.  Just kickin’ down the cobblestones.  Lookin’ for fun and feelin’ groovy.” (Feelin’ Groovy, Simon and Garfunkel)

The words to this ditty came to mind recently while I was on a much needed extended weekend at Ocean City with two friends.  One of my friends, who I have known since childhood, is a registered nurse who works in the home care specialty.  During our “girlfriends’ getaway”, she fell into a deep sleep twice while sitting on the beach front.  I was in conversation with her and after a few moments, she was out like a light.  Later, she thanked me several times for arranging the getaway; said that she “really, really needed it.” Well, my friend keeps a very busy schedule and stays on the run.  Often when I am speaking with her, she is either driving somewhere or in the middle of doing something.  My key phrase to her has always been, “Please slow down.”  I truly believe that all of her rushing and busyness caught up with her and when she was finally still, while sitting on the beach, she conked out.

So many of us are living life in the fast lane, or better still like on the information super highway.  We are always so busy. We cannot make a move without our iPhones, smartphones, lap tops and tablets. We have to email, post on Facebook, tweet on Twitter, Skype and Snap chat.  We are filling our weekends with events and some of us are booked so far in advance that we do not have time to complete a thought. Many are physically and mentally drained from over stimulation.  I have never heard the terms “stressed out” and “burn out” so much in my adult life.  Even children are describing themselves as “stressed”.  What is wrong with this picture?  Well, I will tell you what is wrong!  We are not machines. We are human beings, not human “doings”.

We were not designed to live our lives in a “rat race”, frenzied pace; running here, running there, rushing everywhere; always behind schedule; trying to catch up. Living in a tri-area metropolis, there is always a lot going on.  But you do not have to always be on the go.  Rushing through life, driving at high rates of speed, eating on the go, not getting sufficient rest and exercise for the body increases the incidents of hypertension, stroke, heart disease and other health issues.

In order for us to “be” at peak performance, we must slow down the pace and rest our mind, body and spirit.  We must take time to replenish/refresh our mind, body and spirit.  Sleep deprivation is on the rise.  The body needs sufficient sleep.  As children, most of us were made to take regular naps.  I think we adults need to continue that practice.  During the weekday on your lunch break, you can close your eyes for 10-15 minutes and take a power nap.  I have had to do it on numerous occasions when I was feeling the “drain on my battery”.

Our society touts the phrase “burning the candle at both ends”.  Well, think about that for a minute.  It eventually results in no candle at all.  We need to do better. Life is for the living.  We need to take time to just “be”; to truly enjoy just being in this life.  Appreciate the beauty of the season, a sunrise or sunset, the stars at night, a leisurely stroll in the park, a child’s laughter.  Ask someone how they are doing and take the time to find out their answer.  Stop and smell the roses so to speak.

My clarion call for the necessity to slow down became evident on Christmas Eve of last year.  The cell phone rang at 7:16pm, as I was about to take Pegasus, my dog, out for a walk.  The caller, Frank, was a former co-worker and one of the three men that helped me move into my condo 13 years prior.  He called to tell me that Patrick; his supervisor, our friend and one of the three, had suffered a heart attack and died that evening.  The words “Patrick died” shocked me to the point of practically dropping the phone.  It actually dropped from my ear, but remained in my hand at knee level.  My initial reaction was to scream, but a voice within me said, “Melanie, pull it together.  You need to hear what he’s saying.”  As I returned the phone to my ear, I learned that Patrick had worked that day at his Silver Spring location, stopped at the division’s Gaithersburg location to chat with a few colleagues, then headed home to Hagerstown.  Before reaching home, he made a stop at a convenience store. He collapsed behind the wheel of his parked vehicle.

After concluding the call with Frank, I took Pegasus out into the dark, mild evening, walking around the perimeter of the community in a daze.  It was the most somber Christmas I’ve experienced.  It stayed cloudy, but the temperatures were quite mild.  The sun didn’t peek out until that Sunday.  As time passed and I received more information about Patrick, it was shared that his family had an autopsy performed, which revealed an artery that was 90% blocked and one that had a 20% blockage.  “My God”, was all I could say and think.  “I wonder if he knew how sick he was.”

You see, Patrick was a self-described “busy body”; always going somewhere and doing something.  His position as a transit maintenance shop supervisor, kept him on the go. He loved his job.  And he thrived in the daily goings on.  He enjoyed travel; taking regular vacations and days off for family gatherings.  I used to tell him to “slow down and take it easy”, “stay at home and rest yourself”.  He couldn’t stay put for long.

His sister, who is a nurse, later shared with me that he was dealing with a lot of stress and that she believed he had elevated blood pressure.  Since his death, I have taken the time to educate myself on the importance of effectively dealing with stress, incorporating exercise into your lifestyle and a diet that’s rich in heart healthy foods and low in cholesterol.  Knowing that hypertension, heart disease and high cholesterol are prevalent in the African American community, I have made the necessary lifestyle changes needed to lessen and prevent those ailments.

We must slow down long enough to take the time needed to take care of our health; physical, as well as mental.  It starts with a commitment to self-care.  Knowing that your health is paramount to any other successes you may experience in this life sets the tone with how you’ll conduct your life.

Slow down!  Make regular doctor’s appointments.  Follow your doctor’s orders for lab work and necessary medications.  Find exercise routines and activities that work for you, to get your heart rate elevated.  Change your diet to benefit your heart.  But you must slow down to do it.

A valuable lesson I’ve learned from having a dog is that when I take her for a walk, she’s in no hurry for anything.  She wants to explore and sniff every blade of grass, greet everyone that we pass and stop at the base of every tree.  This little dog has taught me a lot about slowing down and enjoying the simple joys of life.

Recently, I heard Dr. Willie Jolley being interviewed on a radio show and he was speaking about the importance of quiet time.  He stated that each day, we should wind down, decompress and take a couple of minutes to reflect.  I’d like to add that also spending quality time with GOD in prayer, seeking guidance and wisdom for your life, will slow you down as well.   After all, He created you and knows what’s best for your life.  He knows what you need to go the distance and arrive at your destinations refreshed.